I have been going back and forth with my activity in NorthStar and Evergreen type activities and involvement... I don't know if its right for me. Or if I would be better off just fading away from all of that. I took a break for a long time and then got recently re-involved and now I'm wondering if its necessary or what...
I don't feel like I ever really fit in no matter where I am. For those friends who know about my future family plans, they think of me as a nice Mormon guy who is wanting to start a family... but adamantly opposed to marriage. (Interesting combination! I'm a unique blend of ironies...)
And some of my friends who do know about my plans have already freaked out on me to the point I am fearful of discussing them anymore openly. Hence why I have resigned myself to mostly discussing it with non-LDS friends (who are all supportive, btw!) and my blog audience.
So really in the NS and EG community, I don't feel like I fit in either since most of the people in those communities will tell me that my future plans aren't right. Or against the church. Or something along those lines. And I'd rather find people who would accept my decision and be willing to talk about it with me---maybe find a place I belong better.
However, as I said, I never feel like I belong. :(