Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Unrest in Zion

I was IMed by a friend who was upset with the USGA organization. I will not name names as to his identity, but he is a very good guy. Not one of those fanatics I've discussed earlier---the name of the group escapes me... He's not one of them. He's just genuinely concerned.

He brought up some good points. Many of the members are unashamedly admitting to not planning on continuing in the church in the future. Some leaders of the group admit to dating. I know of some who are sexually active.

However, this is not nearly as shocking enough to me that I even take notice.

Why? Because this is how I saw BYU and the Mohos. There are tons who are leaving. Tons who are sexually active. I could have probably had a different fella every weekend if I'd wanted to. (I didn't, I might add---so no one takes this blog as a public confession of my being a common whore. haha.)

Mohos had no voice when I went to BYU. It was common to hear about guys who hadn't done anything to be pulled into the Honor Code office. Merely associating with gay people or going to a club (neither of which are sins, although I don't necessarily SUPPORT people going to clubs necessarily since I'd rather go to the theater...)

Before USGA and some of the public appearances and changes, we had no voice. So most guys left the church because the most vocal community are those who have left. Having USGA brought a dialogue to the BYU community about this being an issue. It also allowed guys to find others who wanted to remain in the church as well. Is it an ideal organization? No. However, I've been involved in NorthStar, Evergreen, and some online support groups. None are ideal. A lot of the people are good. Some are creepy. Some have hit on me outright (I'm gorgeous, what can I say? Kidding.) Others have become good friends and support networks to me.

Where is the best support to be found? I guess here in the Wasatch its easy enough to meet Mohos who are churchy. But not everywhere.

There's a lot of bad seeds no matter where one goes. It causes me to be concerned. I get nervous telling people to go and meet guys and girls in the community. Since some could be dangerous. Not any more dangerous than any other community. Minus that some of the guys can be wolves in sheep's clothing---appear good on the outside, wearing garments, going to church, while secretly being very sexually confused and sexually active.

What is the best set of actions for guys in our situation? I dunno. I just offer advice. Is USGA the answer? I don't know. But so far, we're doing a lot of blind wandering into territory which the church hasn't offered much hope for. Not the level of hope which is comforting, anyway. At least in my opinion.

My best advice? Figure out where you want to be. And stick with it. Focus on things you can have influence over... changes which are effective in the long run. Work on your goals. Take good things from all the groups and people you can. But don't let them differentiate you from the path you really want to be on.

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