There's a lot of talk on my blog about self-defeating attitudes and ideas which are in our minds.
I've talked to a lot of people who say things like "I wish I were cute!" or "I wish I were attractive."
Although unconventional, this is almost a form of a black and white thinking pattern. At the very least, it is a thought process which is unhealthy. Why? Because most people think that attractiveness is completely genetic. As we cannot alter our genetics, it would seem like an unreachable goal. In many peoples' minds, one is either attractive or unattractive as if there was a barrier or wall separating the two groups.
I don't think there is as much of a barrier as we sometimes imagine.
Attractiveness is about 50% natural genetics and 50% what we make of our genetics.
This is all my personal opinion.
I think there are people who are born much more attractive than others. I think there are also people who are less attractive naturally than others. But I think that truly unattractive and truly attractive people make up only a small amount of the population. Probably less than 10% for both groups. Which means that 80% of people fall somewhere in between the Quasimodos and the Romeos. Chances are, most of us fit into the 80% range.
However, if 50% of our looks is based on genetics and 50% is made up of other parts of ourselves, then everyone has a chance to improve themselves on the attractiveness scale.
How many of us complain about our appearance and do nothing about it? Do you take care of your skin? Do you use nice hair products? Try to stay in fashion? Or have you given up?
If 50% of how you look is not something inborn, there's a lot of improvement which could be done.
I think a lot of people have given up on improving themselves.
I'm not talking about giving everyone a full-on makeover. I could never do that. But I think that everyone could have a make-better. Everyone could improve themselves.
If you think you're unattractive or ugly, then I think we can work on that.
I bet you're better looking than you think you are. We just have to get over some of that self-defeating attitude inducing beliefs.