Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Fixing

I don't follow politics but I saw a clip of a little boy who approached Michelle Bachman and said "My mommy's gay but she doesn't need fixing!" And its kind of a funny thought to me...

To me, in a way, if we were supposed to be changed there would be an obvious course of action to be placed on us. If changing our orientation was a requirement, there'd be some direction as to a course of treatment... Psychologists have used shock therapies, hypnosis, etc. to work on changing attractions. I went to a cognitive therapist who helped me realize I COULD be married and have sexual activity with a woman, if I wanted to.

However, to me, there isn't a clear direction. Science has multiple studies with various opposing results. Psychologists have the same. Church leaders say whatever they think which is a mix of the above, and I don't believe always divinely inspired.

Which leads me to this: Its all a state of confusion. Honestly. No one knows what causes homosexual attractions definitively. From what I can see, something inborn might be the cause... might not be genetics. Might not be neural. Might just be some quirk. Or maybe it is a learned behavior---we're called gay growing up by our peers and the bullies, so we accept it. I dunno.

To me, it doesn't matter what causes it. The whole point is we need to choose HOW WE WILL DEAL WITH IT. And that is a very personal desire. We can listen to church leaders, we can listen to community leaders, we can listen to friends, family, the internet, read books about it, etc. but it all comes down to one thing:

How do YOU want to handle it?

I support everyone in their decision, whether they want to stick to the church route or to the non-church route. Either way can bring happiness. However, the one thing I say, and I repeat it... if you CHOOSE YOUR ROUTE... because it is the choice you make which you believe will give you the joy and peace of your attractions... if you make THAT CHOICE for yourself with no influence from trying to please family or church leaders but fully on your own, then you have to stop belly-aching and deal with it. It was your choice. So if you decide to leave the church, don't just sit around complaining about the church---go and live your life. If you decide to stay in the church, don't cry that you aren't sexually active. It was YOUR CHOICE which put you there. You have a myriad of choices. So choose and deal with the consequences.

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