Elle Woods in Legally Blonde the Musical sings a song which has been in my head all day... Its entitled "Legally Blonde." In it, she sings of her misfortunes of going to Law School and feeling as if she failed... and realizing that she's "just meant to be" and that maybe all she was made for was to smile.
Do you ever feel that way? Sometimes I do.
Life has gotten significantly better for me since my Summer European Internship. I spent weeks charting out my own path, in a way, by living essentially on my own in a foreign continent... I had to rely on my own brains, skills, etc. to get by. I had to cope with a lot of stressful situations and I learned from the experience.
I do genealogy research for fun... I guess its the one aspect of myself which makes me even more of an atypical Mormon. I do it 'for fun' knowing that I'm not worthy to have a temple recommend just yet. Working on that and hopefully going to have it someday. :) Anyway, I can't do the temple work for my people at this point but I can do the work leading UP to the Temple Work being completed.
This is the first time I've ever mentioned genealogy on this blog.
Guess its about time.
I didn't feel great today so I sat in my room and typed genealogy, adding 25-30 names of descendants of my 4th great uncle. I trace lots of distant cousins' in my family tree since thats where I find temple names.
As I was doing this work today, I thought "Is this all I'm good for?" Elle believed she was best at just being beautiful. Maybe doing genealogy is what I'm best at and what I'm best suited for.
Do I provide any other good though? Do I brighten others' days? Do I have any other qualities which make me worth more than just what I have been trained to do---which is genealogical research?
Sometimes I wonder. I don't really know if anyone's life has been touched by mine.
Maybe Elle was right---and while I'm not meant to just be pretty and smile---maybe I'm only really good for one thing. At least I do that as perfectly as possible.